NEED TO KNOW
- A man on Reddit’s “AITAH” forum said he is “never hanging out” with his boyfriend’s friends again after they joined the couple’s plans and then canceled last-minute
- “I feel like that’s so disrespectful of my time and energy,” he wrote, asking Reddit users if they think he is “being dramatic”
- Several users agreed that he is being “dramatic” in his response to the canceled plans, while one validated him
A man decided he is “never” going to hang out with his boyfriend’s friends again. today, he’s wondering if his reaction is a bit “dramatic.”
The man, 25, shared his side of the situation in an Aug. 10 Reddit post. Specifically, he recounted the events that led him to write off the friends of his boyfriend, 24, on the platform’s “AITAH (Am I the A——)” subreddit. The response was mixed — but most commenters agreed that he was, as he put it, “being dramatic.”
The man began by explaining that he and his boyfriend “were planning to hang out this weekend together.” At first, the plans were “nothing special,” he said, but then his boyfriend “asked if I wanted to go to the beach.”
This request, he wrote, was a bit “suspicious” to him, “because we never go to the beach.” Wary, he asked his boyfriend who would be joining them — and learned that it would not be just the two of them after all.
“He let me know that it was with his group of friends, and I explained to my boyfriend I had a long week and I wasn’t really in the mood to be social,” the man said. Upon hearing this, his boyfriend became “upset,” so he sucked it up and “decided to go.”
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The day of their today-beach plans, he wrote, “I worked [myself] up to get excited to go,” including making a trip to a store to purchase some beach day essentials. Afterward, he said he called his boyfriend “to ask what time we’re going because I have everything ready” — only to learn that the plans were off.
“He tells me they changed their mind and don’t want to go anymore,” the man wrote, admitting that he was “irked” by the abruptly canceled plans. He recalled, “I told [my boyfriend] I’m annoyed because I didn’t want to go in the first place, [made] myself be optimistic about the situation and then everything is canceled.”
“I told him I don’t want to hang out with his friends again because everyone is so indecisive and [last-minute] and I feel like that’s so disrespectful of my time and energy,” the man continued, noting, “My friends are not like this. If there’s cancellations, it’s DAYS in advance.”
“Why are people so [last-minute] like this?” he concluded his post before asking if he is the “a——” in the scenario.
“AITAH for telling my boyfriend I’m never hanging out with his friends again?” the upset man wrote. Toward the end of the post, he added: “I’d love to hear [whether] or not you think I’m being dramatic!”
In response, several users decided that — at least based on his telling of the events — the man overreacted and was, as he suspected, being “dramatic” in his reaction to the canceled beach plans.
“I can see why you’re irritated. But a lifetime hangout ban is extreme and dramatic,” the leading-voted response read. Agreeing to disagree, the man replied: “I can respect that, I think for the time being though, I would prefer not to.”
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Another user agreed that the man was in the wrong, writing, “It would piss me off, too, BUT would it piss me off to the extent that I would say I will never hang out with them again? No.”
“Unless there is more to this and this is one of a long line of examples of behavior, then you are being dramatic,” the user added, prompting the man to reveal that there was, in fact, a pattern of canceled plans before the beach incident. Including this one, there are “3 different instances,” to be exact.
In one incident, he said, “We were all supposed to go out clubbing and half of them didn’t go.” In the other — outside of the incident detailed in the original post — “We went out to the beach and everyone just separated [into] their own little groups,” the man said, and “some didn’t show up” at all. Plus, he added, “everyone ended up arguing after” about food, money and post-beach plans.
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Ultimately, only one person really validated the man’s reaction, writing: “That would piss me off too. You gave up your plans and then they dropped you. Screw that!”
“Thank you!!!!” the man wrote back. “It makes me feel so dumb for getting excited just to be disappointed.”
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