Woman Refuses to Change Her Last Name After Ex-Husband’s Girlfriend Demands It

A woman is defending keeping her ex-husband’s last name after his new girlfriend demanded that she change it.

On Reddit, the woman explained that she was married to her ex-husband for four years. While she initially didn’t change her last name after getting married, she changed her mind after their daughter was born because she wanted them all to “share a last name.”

“We divorced in early 2022 and I kept the last name because my daughter still has it and again, neither of us cared much,” she writes.

speedy forward to today, and her ex has a new girlfriend. Recently, when the poster went to pick up her daughter at their house, the girlfriend “came outside, shut the door, and said she needed to talk to me.”

“She told me that her and my ex want to get married, but the ‘only thing standing in the way’ is that I haven’t changed my last name back,” the poster recalls. “She said she thought it was ‘very weird’ that I kept it in the first place and even offered to pay for my name change and insisted it would be super easy.”

However, the woman notes that she finds it “really odd” that her last name “is supposedly the only thing stopping them from getting married.”

“I don’t know why I, as his ex-wife, should have anything to do with their decision to move forward,” she writes, noting that it “doesn’t seem fair” for her to have to change her name “just to appease someone else.”

“Aside from the connection to my child, I have a career and I am involved professionally in the community so my name carries some weight beyond my marriage and divorce,” she writes.

The woman also found it “offensive” that they would offer to pay for her name change, since her ex-husband allegedly owes her $20,000 in unpaid child support. 

“It feels like their priorities are wildly misplaced,” she adds.

Despite the issue at hand, the poster notes that she has “never had issues” with the girlfriend and doesn’t “want to be combative since she is around my daughter sometimes and I want to be sure I am justified in my decision before responding.”

“I was also completely caught off guard and in a hurry to pick up my daughter, so I didn’t say any of this to her at the moment- I just told her I’d look into it,” she concludes, asking Reddit for advice on what to do.

People in the comments section encouraged her to keep the name, suggesting that the ex is just looking for an excuse as to why he doesn’t want to marry his current partner.  

“You don’t have to change your name for them to get married. She’s trying to pull a jealous little power play,” one person commented. “You wanted your name to match your child’s name and that is perfectly normal and reasonable. Keep the name for absolutely any reason you want. Your name is not her business.”

“Once you changed your name it became your name not his. That’s really the end of the story if you want it to be! And if you want to have the same name as your child that’s fair, but the reason doesn’t matter as it’s your name not theirs,” another person commented.